Haiz.... tired as usual...

Quite crappy day ... don't know wat else thr is to explain..

got pissed in the afternoon for doin NTHIN~ ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

Will go to tat later..

Then 6+ go to bb court to find my frens to play..

cause The court near my house got alot of people and we dun like to play wif them...

so we decided to go to anchorvale cc to play =D

had fun thr.. haha my basketball skills haven rise or fall since the last time ==..

Made some mistakes here and thr.. damn Pai seh.. cause pass to wrong person..

Keep on change team mate arh.. then hungry.. abit seh diao haha

Then.. yea.. after bball about 930pm

rch kou fu bout 10pm.. have my dinner of course..

haha... had a small chat wif JK.. talked bout our life stuffs haha..

man talk.. =p..

so yea.. kinda happy..

then Came back home.. didnt even say a word till now..

see my dad face nia sian.. dun even feel like speakin..

Not like tat i DUN like him..

i jux dun feel like talkin to him.. bloody hell everytime he speaks ..

It feels like he is INSULTING ME PLEASE!

okok back to the story of wat happened in the afternoon

PLEASE IM DAMN PISSED AT IT!

Cause I got Shot For No reason And He SAYS NO I DIDNT!

WHAT THE FUCK PLEASE!

I dun wanna use the 'F' Word.. But seRiously! WTF!

ok I did Nothin.. I am jux feedin My hamster.. I changed the bedding and stuffs.. TOTALLY NOTHIN TO OFFEND HIM OK! NOTHING!

im happy cause i changed the beddin for my hammies and they look happy.

so i turned in to the livin room and stand by the dinin table to watch a variety show.

then ok now start of conversation.. he say

HEY DID U READ THE NEWS PAPER?..

Theres a GUY that KILLED SOMEONE BECAUSE HE PLAYED TOO MUCH GAME and the game should be 'WOW' since normal warcraft have nothin for ppl to have a reason to kill another person.

SO... continuing.. he said.. ARE U LIKE THAT?.. I was like WTF! and i didnt bother to reply him.. cause i dont wanna quarrel .. i HELD back.. and cont watchin the show

Bloody hell.. he continued OI OI OI! i was like OK WTF U WANT! of course i didnt say wtf... i jux said WHAT?!.. and i look at him STRAIGHT IN THE EYE..

OK.. when u call someone.. and the person don't wanna reply purposely means.. he/she dont wan to quarrel or speak with u. cause obvious reason.. Are u TRYIN TO FUCKIN HELL SAY TAT I AM GONNA DO OR I ALREADY DID TAT? Or are u tryin to accuse me of something?

People tat know me.. U think i am those that will run ard killin people? I Cant even slap a person in the FACE U EXPECT ME TO KILL SOMEONE?

I can Say TRUELY... I TRUST MY FRENS MORE THAN I TRUST MY FAMILY.

Ok now back to after i said WHAT?!.. he said Did u Hear what i jux said.. are u a game addict? .. U HAVE GAME VIOLENCE?ARE U THE SAME AS HIM? WTF! Seriously WTF!..

Now im even more pissed.. so i said back in a louder voice.. NO! Of course Not. Are U tryin to say im like Him.. Do u think I would be tat brainless?.. Yes I play Games.. I admit im abit of a game addict.. BUT NO I HAVE NO FREAKIN GAMING VIOLENCE!

then he said.. Later u play the game somemore then u go kill people.. HACK! KNN!. then i say.. U'LL BE THE FIRST ONE I KILL!.. i know its not a right thign to say.. but BUT BUT! u pushed me to my Limits DAmn it. I have Never Wanted to say it. U THINK SAYING IT MAKES ME FEEL GOOD.? GOD! Damn it cAn..

Then the quarrel continued.. and i was fuckin pissed till i dont wan to say a word ANYMORE CAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL MORE WORST JUX TO QUARREL WIF U!

U KEEP ON SAYIN I SHOW NO RESPECT! FUCK! THERES A LIMIT TO WHR I CAN HOLD MY ANGER OK! U FUCKIN SHOT ME AND U FUCKING DENIED IT STRAIGHT IN MY FACE!

I shouted back.. i Held On to My own PRIDE... I live by My Rules.. U DONT KNOW ME SO FUCKIN SHUT THE HELL UP! U are My Parents! damn it.. and u fuckin dont trust me at all? JUX BECAUSE I PLAY GAMES WHEN IM FREE?

And BECAUSE I PLAY GAMES TATS Y I HAVE GAMING VIOLENCE? DAMN U! Then What bout those other people Thats playin games Way More and Worst then me .. WOULDN't THERE BE A FUCKIN MASSACRE By now?

Think Before u talk god damn it. u can joke.. we can talk properly.. blah blah.. but dun poke into peoples uneasy points.. if u say it in a different way .. like how my frens and i communicate.. i would not even raise my voice at u and we WOULDnt have quarreled.

U can say u dun feel like u are accusing me .. But i dun feel tat way.. Cause in my eyes.. I can feel tat u are tryin to Hurt me in everyway with ur every Word.

I dun feel good.. thats y i'd hit back.. i have to defend myself.. I am no senseless piece of shit that u can jux manupilate and kick ard.. no.. I have my own mind.. i have my Pride.. I Know wat i am.. i know wat to do and wat not to do..

Hell i think i even suffered more than u suffered ur whole life. Gettin beat up is jux physical pain.. Have u ever been Mentally.. hurt?

U make me hard to talk to u.. Infact whens the last time we ever had a proper talk for hours... NO? maybe when i was a kid.. when im brainless and all this shit..?

stop tryin to think that i haf no brains.. I know i am not an adult.. but my mind is more than jux an adult.. i think deep. I think of possible reasons.. ways..

I make hard decisions.. I suffer Mental attacks.. Have u?

IF no.. stop tryin to accuse me of something that i am not and tryin to make urself sound RITE CAUSE U ARE MY DAD?

U dont know me.. Sometimes i dun even know u. I tried to understand and know u..

But u gave me the chance to let me put tat trust in u..? when u dun even put ur trust in me?

i speak my mind and thoughts to my frens.. but never to u.. Both of u.. Know y? cause i dun feel save to even talk to u..

I had suffer more hardship...i counsel myself.. i too seek others for answers.. but not u.. NEVER.. cause i know.. U'll find the fault in me in watever i say.

how can we ever talk like this? HOW?..

I wan to be like other people.. Have a good relationship wif thier parents..

Haven u Noticed that im THAT DAMN QUIET... i had Never really spoken in the house other than laugh at The TV?.

I trust mom more than u.. cause she never really accuse me of anything. she Does most of the stuffs for me.. she helps me.

haiz.. i dun wanna say anymore..

jux hope for things to change..

God Bless!